I’m growing a ‘tache.
For charity.
A men’s health charity in fact.

And I would love love love it if you could sponsor me. It’s easy really, click through and hit the ‘donate’ button. £1, £10 or even £100; all are welcome.

My Mum sponsored me a tenner, and left me a comedy limerick:

A moustache is a way to donate.
But remember the food on your plate,
when eating your food,
take care now, you dude
and don’t let the crumbs be your fate.

My sister, not to be outdone, did the same (both on the tenner and poem front):

I heard you’re trying to raise a stash,
by growing a handlebar ‘tash.
But remember, when you’re through,
The Village People may kidnap you
and make you dance YMCA for cash!!

Thing is about my family, they’re a competitive bunch and, well, my Mum came back again!
Mum, over to you…

A man whose moustache looked a fright
Was OK till he went out at night
when out came the moon
The girls they did swoon
then screamed when he turned on the light

A man who liked to drink gin
Grew a ‘tash that was long & quite thin
It wasn’t a joke
when, like a sponge, it did soak
& his glass had nothing left in!

A man who ate lots of goulashes
Had a ‘tash that was made of eyelashes
It fluttered each day
in quite a good way
But the glue gave him lots of red rashes.

A man wearing jeans colour RED !
Wanted a moustache to match (he once said).
He dyed it quite bright
and thought he’d done right
but he stopped the traffic instead

A man down in Maida Vale way
Grew a moustache that helped him portray
the man that he is
all Whatley & whizz
And the rest – well I shouldn’t say!

Amazing. Lost for words really.. Grinning, but lost for words.
They’ve donated, you should too.

Thanks all.

Messing about with my family in my sister’s back garden – the perfect way to end Christmas Day

— Shot on a Nokia N8, yesterday, somewhere near Dulwich.

Last year my other half laid on the best birthday experience ever; including all my friends, all my geekiness and nearly all of London’s Soho district.

It was fantastic.

This year has been – amazingly – even better. Friday night I was out with work for a huge, multi-celebratory knees up. Three birthdays, two leavers and one awesome award win meant that it was the perfect combination for getting the whole company out together. It’s a rarity for all of us to unwind like that and it was definitely well overdue for some of us. I guess I got home about 4ish maybe? But even then didn’t get to sleep until the very early hours (what with deciding to carry on partying with everyone at home way back in the vale). Brilliant.

Last night was my actual birthday party; friends old and new, a few work colleagues, best mates from home, some family (it’s my sister’s birthday today too) and of course, my gorgeous rockstar of a girlfriend all made it one of the best nights out I’ve had this year.

A night of music from the 80s, filthy fairy cakes, beetlejuice-based hilarity, Marmite-flavoured chocolate… the list goes on.

Looking through my phone this morning there’s only a few photos to show off what a great night we all had (I’m sure others took many, many more), however I did find one video. One very special video.

Big love and thanks to Bryce & Camilla for today’s #vlomo10 entry. You guys rock… X

^Turn it up to 720p

Moleskine entry: April 1st, 2010

There’s a bunny in bag and he’s made of chocolate.

I’ve been to Switzerland today well, at the time of writing I’m technically still in Zurich; sat in the plane, awaiting departure. We’ll be on our way back to London shortly. It’s been a long day.

Why Zurich? Work, surprise surprise. But still LOTS of fun nonetheless. If I can talk about them by the time I write this up then you’ll know that it was… SKINS

If all you can see is an image of my moleskine, then sorry – can’t talk about it just yet. But if it’s not, then you can tell that the meeting was successful. Win.

It’s Easter this weekend (hence the bunny) and I’m looking forward to some proper R’n'R.

Chill Winston.

That is if this flight ever gets a move on. I was up at 5am this morning to be at London City Airport for 7am, leaving at 8.

It has been a long day (and it’s nowhere near over yet).

We were originally scheduled to land at 1945, that’s now looking like 2115. Damn. Quick drink with the office lot then off to meet the girlfriend who’s out somewhere near Westminster…

The date at the top of this page is April 1st. Fools’ day. I didn’t play any tricks (although I heard about some crackers). My mum and I used to try and get each other every year. She emailed me today and said it was a quiet one.

I miss my mum. She kind of rocks.

X

A zealot I am not.

iPods enforce iTunes. iPhones enforce iPods. I don’t like the iProducts, because I like to do things my way. Mine. Not Apple’s.

I digress.

When I was eight years old, my father bought my sister and I the complete Encyclopedia Britannica; appendices, indexes – the lot. This was before the Internet, before the Web, before Wikipedia.

The Encyclopedia Britannica got me through school. I used to sit and read through the pages, sometimes just for fun. ‘Let’s see what I can learn today’ was my daily motto. It was a thing of wonder.

When I look at the iPad, that is what I see.

Not a great big iPhone, nor a simplified MacBook Pro. Just a small boy, spread out on the lounge floor. With his school books on one side and the iPad on the other, he’s laying there, doing his homework.

For that reason and for that reason alone, I think I might get one.

That little guy on the left, is my brother Stephen and that bigger guy on the right is my Dad. They both live in Gibraltar and I really don’t get to see them much. Last week, my Dad was over here, in London and – through various circumstances – I didn’t make time to see him.

I know he checks on me here from time to time, so hopefully he’ll see this today:

November 3rd 2009: My Dad’s Birthday.

Dad, this one’s for you.

Happy Birthday, x.

From me, Victoria and of course – all the guys from my new office

Well.. its been ages since my last ‘proper’ update I know.. so..
Let’s address that shall we?!

Ok.. so last time we spoke I’d just got to Gibraltar.

Did I mention all about that?

*goes back and checks previous blogs*

Right.. you get the basic gist of the whole ‘last minute trip’ thing?
Basically – I had an inkling that I might be going but it wasn’t confirmed to me until about 7pm on the Wednesday evening!
So I packed super sharpish and then the following day I (phoned in sick at work – bad man I know) then jumped on a train to Gatwick!
Woo..

I must admit I was chuckling to myself a bit on the flight over – it was just SO random! 24hrs previously if you’d have asked me what will I be doing this time tomorrow.. “Err.. working!” ..would’ve been the response!

Ah well. But yeah – it was a surprise for my Dad. As I mentioned previously – I havent spent Father’s Day with him in about 20yrs.. He left when I was everso young see.. there’s a whole different blog you could dedicate to dealing with that whole thing, so I’m not gonna even try and go into it here.
My Dad left, he now lives in Gibraltar. Thats it. Not gonna bother with the rest.

So yeah – it was cool - as I said - I was going to go and see my Dad – but as ever, whenever I’m over there – I spend all my time with my l’il bro.

He is UBER cool.

(excuse to post another pic? oh go on then)

Yup. That’s my bro.

Anywhoo – yeah – so my weekend was cool. Had some good chats with my Dad. Been needing to see him of late considering the amound of crap I’ve been through and stuff y’know?
But yeah… it was nice to hang out.
I was always sleep so much more there y’know? Just kick back and properly relax.. its cool.

It’s always slightly hard being at my Dad’s. He’s got a few issues..
Erm.. long story short: About 10yrs ago or so an Acrow Prop fell about 20ft and embedded itself into his head.. all very nasty. But yeah – no immediate problems – still alive etc – but after a while.. a few memory issues revealed themselves.
Think ’Memento’ but not as intense.
My Dad lost a large chunk of his long term memory but also his short term memory took a beating too.. so you can talk to him and then mid-sentence he’ll just forget what he’s talking about.. which is ok – you can nudge him and he might remember.. but he just forgets stuff.
Anyway – thats hard - on top of that he cant really think straight a lot of the time and gets quite paranoid.. its quite hard to deal with.
I got a bit upset while I was over there.. I’ll tell ya why..

Sometimes its hard. I like going to see my family in Gibraltar y’know but I can’t really deal with being there for a long time.. and on the Saturday it was already beginning to get to me… and then I feel worse because here I am in Gibraltar, seeing my Dad and my Brother and I want to come home! I mean how selfish do I want to be?!

So yeah - I got a bit upset.. so I had a moan to my mate Ash who, in all fairness to him, gave me a right kick up the backside. I stopped moping about and just enjoyed being there y’know?

My Dad’s cool. I do like talking to him and my brother’s wicked too.
In fact – here they are!
)

So yeah -
I had a good time in Gib. It had its ups and downs but there were more ups. Definitely.
)

So yeah – got home from Gibraltar last Sunday evening..

Monday: Went to work – all good. Monday night my friend Susan came over and cooked dinner for us which was nice – havent seen her in a while and we had a good natter..
(Thai Red Curry – with that thai-paste I bought that day in Tescos ZenJen!)
..AND we finished off two bottles of wine – whoopsee! Hahaha..
Anyway – yeah – that was cool.. walked Susan home and came back and crashed out..

Tuesday: I woke up – felt a bit rough.. decided to blow work out.
Yep. I know – poof. A little bit of wine and I go sick with a hangover..
Well NO – it wasnt like that.. I just fancied chilling out so THERE.
Tuesday night I went to me mate Mickey’s house and watched the England go through to the last 16 of the World Cup by winning their group against Sweden. That was also tres cool.. and yet again.. I drank a bottle of wine.

Wednesday: woke up.. felt a bit rough.. (you can see where this is going already cant you) ..blew work out! Hahah..
Wednesday was a nice sunny day if I recall correctly so I did all my washing that day yeah – good domesticated young lad that I am. )
Cant remember what I did Wednesday night now.. Hmmm.. Ah well.

Thursday: Took the day off AGAIN, (you know I hate my job right?)
Again – cant really remember exactly what I did with my day.. I THINK it involved sunbathing and stuff but anything after that is a bit vague..
Thursday night I had Drama Workshop over in Surbiton. That was cool.
There was LOADS of us – best turnout yet. Had a great laugh and went for a drink afterwards too.. )

Friday: Well. If you’re gonna take Thursday off you may as well take the Friday too! Hehehe.. Friday I got up, chilled out, packed my bags (you’ll see why) and went and met my mate Jobs for lunch at Liverpool Street.

Here we are:

We were a bit hammered at that point.. because..
I say ‘lunch’.. there wasn’t really any eating involved.. just drinking. So yeah.. It was a beautiful afternoon so we spent about four hours drinking wine in the city.. got shedded. Was WELL funny. I was heading down to Essex afterwards to hang out with some of my friends there.. God knows how I made it back!
I know that I decided to try and find Fenchurch St station at some point.. and then the next thing I remember I was on Canvey Island.. so I must’ve made it on my own somehow! Hahaha..
That was cool.. Got back to Canvey, nipped home, dropped my bag off and then rocked on round to my best mate Tony’s.

Me and the Sensei had a nice evenin’ drinkin’ and catchin’ up.. all good.
Although.. I got THAT hammered I ended up crashin’ at Tony’s and I NEVER crash at Tony’s. I always walk home y’know? But yeah.. I was TRASHED. Hahaha.. never mind.

Saturday: I woke up at about 7am ish. Dragged my sorry ass back to me Mum’s. My Mum by the way is currently in Cyprus – so I had the house to myself. Which was coooooool as. My own little pad y’know?
So yeah – Saturday, go home, shower, change, go and see my gay uncle down at the Barber’s.
Don’t Ask.

Then took a walk round town – bumped into my mate Zoe – that was cool. Had a really good chat with her.. she’s an old friend of mine… and if I hadn’t already written an absolute marathon blog post I’d probably go into what we talked about – maybe another day. A few of you already know.. I’ll leave it at that for now..
So yeah – Saturday night went back round Tony’s, got drunk again.. managed to make it home on my own this time though – so I wasnt THAT bad! Hahah..

Sunday: Woke up on the sofa in me Mum’s front room. Mental. Stayed there the whole weekend and not once did I crash on the bed. Numpty.. although.. saying that.. my Mum’s sofa is SO comfy..
I digress…
Sunday – got up, cut the grass (I’m a good boy) and then my mate Laws came over for a moan about all the men in her life – hahah – so that was quite funny. She’s just out of the otherside of a nasty breakup is Laws and we always have a good chat. Sharing advice etc.. y’know.. anyway – Laws left and Bodge turned up.. Me and Bodge grabbed Tony and Big Dave and we went for a kickabout before the footy.. Nice.. s’been YEARS since we did anything like that - had a right laugh.
Went back to mine (well – me Mum’s) afterwards and watched the England make it through to the World Cup Quarter Finals by beating Ecuador 1-0 thanks to a sublime David Beckham free kick..
We got Pizza.. . (thats officially the most un-healthiest thing I’ve eaten since arriving home from Thailand) ..and got on the beers (again) and then everyone left so I could pack up and head back to Twickenham.

Slight problem with that.. I’m bat-faced.
..and the last thing I wanna do is spend 2hrs on Sunday trains dragging myself back to Twickers. So I slacked it off… with the intention to get up early this morning and then go to work from Canvey..
Obviously that didn’t happen..
Whoops.

I am back in Twickenham NOW.
But I’m not at work.. I WILL go back tomorrow.. I WILL!

ehe..

Anyway – I’ve had a great weekend.
I’ve hardly spent any money ( i dont have any! )
But…
In general…
Life is pretty good…

I’ve got a new job starting soon…

I’ve got some great friends… (you know who you are)
..and some crackin’ mates. (so do you)
So yes..

Ladies & Gentlemen – I am a very lucky man and I am enjoying my life.
Thank you.

Next time I won’t leave it so long – I promise.

UPDATE COMING SOON!

In the meantime however – here’s some pics of me and my bro in Gibraltar!

)

His name is Stephen Arthur James Whatley, he’s six years old, he’s ginger and he means business..

My bro’s gonna be a little heartbreaker..!

One more?

Oh ok then..

)

I love my brother. He’s awesome.

I’ll type up some stuff later – but yeah – Stephen’s one of the main reason’s I go to Gibraltar..

He ROCKS!

Hahah – see what I did there? He Rocks?!
Yeah? ..as in The Rock of Gibraltar?!
I know.. Hahahaha.. Brilliant.